Why do I get up when I keep getting kicked down? Why do i bother? It’s more comfortable staying down it seems. It hurts to get up again because I know I’m just going to get kicked down AGAIN. I have had a full life and I am just waiting for death. I’m not going to take my own life. I am waiting for it to end. Won’t somebody put a gun to my head while I’m sleeping? Make it painless as I’ve had enough pain.